White House Dinner Theatre

The Scene:

The Oval office. The lights are down. Three men sit next to the President's desk. The lights of Washington twinkle in the background.

The Players:

Robert Gibbs. Gibby. The Family Guy.

Rahm Emanual. Rahmbo. Dead Fish.

The President.

Act 1

The curtain raises in mid-conversation.

President: Holding a paper in his hand. "But I gave them three more weeks of cash for clunkers and THIS is how they repay me?"

Rahm: "That poll means nothing. Its not personal, they still really like you. We'll get the healthcare thing done and then we can rebuild your approval numbers by Christmas. Just imagine the images of children opening gifts in the White House again. It'll be magic."

President: "What! Not personal. That's funny coming from you. You said this would be done by August. You said those Tea Party dipshits were a flash in the pan. You said you had the party in line. What the fuck happened?"

Rahm: "Look, I accept that, but this will be done in a few weeks and people will forget. Don't worry. This thing will pass. Healthcare reform doesn't kick in until your second term. People will forget. There will be other things..."

President: "Second term! Don't insult me. Bush got reelected Rahm. Fucking Bush got reelected..." His head drops.

Rahm knows better than to speak for a minute. Just give the man a minute and he will regain his composure. Unlike that fucking wife of his...

A waiter knocks and quietly enters with the evening snack ordered earlier. Nachos. No one is hungry now, but the waiter is a welcome distraction from the tension. As he leaves, Rahm senses that the mood is lightened.

Rahm: "I have the focus group information we discussed earlier. Many of the cash for... ideas tested off the chart. Cash for spl..."

President: "ENOUGH! No more gimmicks. I want my ass out of the kettle."

Gibbs: "Gentlemen, if I may."

President and Rahm: "Shut the fuck up Gibbs!"

The curtain lowers.

End of Act 1